Making It Through The Wilderness.

Ferry Angry

I believe that when you have animals you should do your best to keep them with you at all times. This is why, whenever possible, Lilu (cat) and Potato (dog) come with me on my holidays. Our last trip was to Guernsey, we went there on the ferry.

The ferry takes around two and a half hours from Weymouth to Guernsey. During which time Potato and Lilu sleep in the car, and I sit in the cabin either feeling sick or sleeping. This time, I opted for sleeping.

So there I was on a relatively empty boat sitting on a chair, which was at a table, where none of the other chairs (4) were taken. I thought it fair to sit at the empty table and have a little sleep. Apparently, it was not at all fair.

I became aware of a strong presence surrounding me. Even with my eyes closed I knew I was in trouble. When I opened them my senses couldn’t have been more right. I was faced with none other than ANGRY FAMILY.

My Bad Girl Guides

A bit of fun (although completely serious).

tinyurl.com/badgirlguides

Cosmopolitan Magazine – Movie Sex Myths.

Here is the link to a piece I wrote for the June, 2011 edition of Cosmo.

 

It is about movie sex vrs real sex

 

Hope you likey x

Movie Sex Myths

Laughter Yoga? Are you being funny?

Hello, my name is Dawn Porter and I…

‘…started to wonder what this was all about. Why not just watch an episode of The Office and laugh for real? Why meet strangers in a room full of denim and no windows and pretend to laugh at them?’

As I entered the building in Uptown Manhattan a little old lady walked about three feet ahead of me. I crept in front of her and opened the door, she didn’t look up, she didn’t say thank you, but just walked on with a face completely void of expression. Once in the elevator she pressed the button for floor 11. ‘No’ I thought ‘She can’t be’…

She was.

My Adventures in Wonderland…

It was January in New York City and the air was so cold I could feel it hit my lungs. The sky was blue, but every sidewalk, every chimney top and every tree was coated in a thick layer of solid white. Beautiful to look at, catastrophic under foot.

In the midst of this winter Wonderland there was me, trudging in a pair of $30 boots from the Army Surplus store through the streets of Little Italy. I was on my way to meet a guy I’d heard about through another guy, who says he could sort me out with some stuff.

My poison on this occasion was Miracle Fruit. A tiny red berry originating from West Africa that contains Miraculin – a sweetness inducer that temporarily alters your taste buds so that everything bitter becomes sweet. Could this finally be the answer to my Irish boyfriends disappointment in my lack of appreciation for Guinness??  I hoped so.